Thursday, September 6, 2012

The Daily Dish

Al Butterman Gives the Lowdown on Former Daily Brass Staff Members:

Dear Reader,

Now that this blog has changed identities, and Your Humble Reporter has risen from recently unemployed book blogger to Chairman and CEO of this very book blog (The Comeback Kid!), you might think the time has come to forget the past, forgive and forget the comrades who behaved so badly, and look instead to a bright and productive future.  Well, you’d be wrong!

No doubt you’ve read about the recent scandals involving authors buying positive book reviews.  Well, you’ll never guess which former Editor-in-Chief of the Daily Brass was caught giving his own books five-star reviews on Goodreads.  I’ll give you a hint.  The name rhymes with Twistabar Cerebellum.  Well, it doesn’t rhyme perfectly.   It’s a slant rhyme.  A better rhyme would be Mist-a-mar BerryJella.  OK, I’ll just tell you--it was Christamar Varicella.  What a jerk!

Speaking of scandals, a certain high profile Open Letters Editor--this is the same guy who was once arrested for stalking Mr. Greenjeans of Captain Kangaroo fame--was recently kicked out of the barn in which he was living for, well, let’s just say he was getting a little too friendly with a milking machine.  Pasteurize much?  I think I’ll be skipping the dairy section for the next few days.  You go girl!   

And finally...

A certain recently-ousted Daily Brass book reviewer showed up at the apartment of Your Humble Reporter last night and bashed him over the head with a metal trashcan lid.  This little stunt cost her a night in the Klink and led to a dozen stitches across the humble  brow of This Reporter.  Talk about anger issues--Sally Putterman has some serious anger issues.  Could there be a lawsuit in the future?  Let me check my crystal ball... All signs point to yes!

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