Dear Reader,
Now that this blog has changed identities, and Your
Humble Reporter has risen from recently unemployed book blogger to Chairman
and CEO of this very book blog (The Comeback Kid!), you might think the time
has come to forget the past, forgive and forget the comrades who behaved so badly,
and look instead to a bright and productive future. Well, you’d be wrong!
No doubt you’ve read about the recent scandals involving
authors buying positive book reviews. Well,
you’ll never guess which former Editor-in-Chief
of the Daily Brass was caught giving
his own books five-star reviews on Goodreads.
I’ll give you a hint. The name
rhymes with Twistabar Cerebellum. Well,
it doesn’t rhyme perfectly. It’s a slant rhyme. A better rhyme would be Mist-a-mar
BerryJella. OK, I’ll just tell you--it
was Christamar Varicella. What a jerk!
Speaking of scandals, a certain high profile Open
Letters Editor--this is the same guy who was once arrested for stalking Mr.
Greenjeans of Captain Kangaroo fame--was recently kicked out of the barn in
which he was living for, well, let’s just say he was getting a little too
friendly with a milking machine. Pasteurize
much? I think I’ll be skipping the dairy
section for the next few days. You go
girl!
And finally...
A certain recently-ousted Daily Brass book reviewer
showed up at the apartment of Your Humble Reporter last night and bashed him
over the head with a metal trashcan lid.
This little stunt cost her a night in the Klink and led to a dozen
stitches across the humble brow of This
Reporter. Talk about anger issues--Sally
Putterman has some serious anger issues.
Could there be a lawsuit in the future?
Let me check my crystal ball... All signs point to yes!
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